Self destructive behavior is the act of hurting yourself. Applying pain, hurt and suffering to yourself is a self destructive behavior. Self destructiveness is the…
I peeled the ginger quickly and when I was done I threw it inside my mouth fiercely. My face cringed as it’s mint taste went through my throat. But I didn’t care. I was going to fight this.
I peeled another one and another one and kept eating them till my throat burnt. That was when I rushed to get a cup of water. I opened the fridge to get a bottle of water when I heard her voice again in my head
“Chika, what if it’s Corona Virus. Remember, one of the symptoms is waist pain”. She said.
“Oh God! Please I promise you I will not sin again”, I cried, “From today I’ll do everything your word said. Everything. I’ll be a good girl. Just take away this pain or what ever this is”. I prayed. Silently freaking out.
I closed the fridge abruptly and ran to the kitchen and quickly put on the gas, filled the kettle with water and allowed it to boil.
“No no no! It’s not possible. I can’t have the virus. There are other major symptoms like dry throat, cough and less breathing. Waist pain is nothing”. I thought to myself.
I turned off the gas and poured the hot water into the cup. I poured it into my mouth and screamed the minute it hit my tongue “Shit!” I threw the cup.
“Enough. I no do again. I can’t suffer myself again. Let the coronavirus come”. I said. Obviously, tired of all the nonsense I’ve been doing.
I burnt my tongue for the second time because of some ridiculous notion that I had corona virus. laughs
I know you’re laughing at me and you’re free to do so but there’s something I want you to understand.
Everyone at some point in their life have prayed the same prayer I prayed.
You walk boldly into doing the wrong thing, something totally against your faith and morality. And when it goes sour you start fidgeting asking God to spare you one more time.
A guy hides drugs in his room and the day he realizes he forgot to lock his room, he becomes frightened and starts praying to God so that his parents wouldn’t enter his room by chance and see the drugs because he knows the repacautions he would face.
Then why do drugs in the first place?
A girl has sex with a guy and when she doesn’t see her monthly period in due time she starts shaking and prays to God to save her and make her period come and that if he does, she would never talk to any man, she’ll never have sex before marriage. She’ll never visit any man. Trying to bargain with God.
When the bitter truth is even if God does something, she’d still go back to doing what she promised she wouldn’t. After all God is a merciful God. Totally misusing his mercies and grace.
God is not a God of Trade by batter.
The fact is we can’t count how many times we’ve tried bargaining with God on silly things when we notice that our wrong doing is about to blow up right in front of our faces.
That’s not right.
God doesn’t show up only when you are about to die. He shows up everyday. He is there while you’re sleeping, eating, driving and working.
So why show up only when you’re on the brink of death? Why show up when you feel like? Why come to him when it’s too late? When you should have been at his feet from the very beginning.
Call him now.
Don’t bargain. Just serve him.
P/s – I later found out the cause of my waist pain which had nothing to do with the virus or anything health-related. I was absolutely fine the next day. Now I’m ashamed of all the rubbish I did to myself in the name of coronavirus. *laughs* Be wise guys.
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